Last Day at Greenwood: Photos!

Today was my last shift at Greenwood. I know I’ve complained about work a lot, but it’s only when I’m leaving that I realise how good I had it and how attached I’ve become to the shop and its people. On the extremely small chance that any of my now-ex-colleagues are reading this, thanks again for the presents and everything :)

(And if you don’t want your photo on my blog, tell me!)

This is M, the pharmacist-in-charge. I’ve spent more time in the dispensary with her than anywhere else in the pharmacy.

Interesting fact: I met her daughter A on Bored of Studies forums in year 12. I remembered A lived in Chatswood so one day I overheard M talking to her daughter using the same name and knowing that M lived in Chatswood I asked and found out that Bored of Studies girl was in fact M’s daughter. I decided not to mention anything about A dating this guy she met on the forum.

I remember I used to leave my wallet lying around the dispensary and M would nag me to keep it out of sight in case it gets stolen. I never bothered and then one day she decided to hide it to teach me a lesson and it worked except a few weeks later I lost it in Kirribilli.

Customer Etiquette Lesson #46

When I ask you how often you use your Ventolin inhaler or how many Nurofen tablets you’re taking a day or any other questions requesting a NUMBER or FREQUENCY or MEASURE OF TIME please answer quantitatively because how often is “not that often” and how many tablets is “not too many” and how long ago is “a little while”?

When you ask the cashier at Coles what you have to pay for groceries do they tell you “oh, not too much”?

Morning After Pill Revisited

Girl: I was just wondering, I’m on the pill, but I’ve just started so I’m taking the white sugar tablets. Do I still need to take the morning after pill?
Me: Have you had unprotected sex?
Girl: Last night.
Me: And you’ve only taken the sugar pills.
Girl: Yes.
Me: So you haven’t taken any active tablets.
Girl: No.
Me: So … in other words, you haven’t taken anything at all.
Girl: So do I need the Morning After Pill?

Caves Beach

Everyone else is still at the beach house for M’s birthday. I came back for work in the morning. I was sleepy and it wasn’t busy and they would have been fine without me. On top of that MJ decided that I was too “quiet” today for her liking. Maybe SHE can try sorting invoices on a day when she should be at the beach.

Customers are funny. After the cholesterol & henna lady, there was one who came in today asking for something that sounded like “cheniten oral”. I thought it sounded a little bit like “Canesten” so I asked her if that was what she meant. She said no, so I asked her to repeat what she wanted and she did so about five times and I still had no idea what she was saying.

She then took out a little electronic dictionary and typed what she wanted to buy in her language then translated it into English and held it out for me to read.

It said “genitals”.

I tried really hard to arrange my face into a neutral expression. I asked her whether it’s thrush, and she pointed her finger at her vagina and nodded. Then I asked her what symptoms she had, and the word didn’t register. She held out her dictionary and I typed in “symptoms” and then “translate”.

With a look of dawning understanding she nodded at me. I pointed to the dictionary and said, “what symptoms?” and she said “yes”.

While I tried to think of new ways of communicating my question it suddenly clicked for her. She scratched the back of her hand fervently while looking at me meaningfully. “Itchy?” I asked her, and she nodded.

I was pretty sure “discharge” wasn’t in her vocabulary so I simply asked if there was anything else. She typed something into her dictionary. “Leakage”. I took that as “discharge”.

Because there are so many treatment regimens for thrush I asked her which dosage form she wanted. She lifted her fingers into the air, pinched an invisible pessary, and inserted it into her wazoo. “Pessary”, I confirmed. She looked confused, so I said “a vaginal tablet”. Upon hearing “tablet” she shook her head frustratedly thinking I meant oral and it took some time and some help from her friend before we came to an understanding.

It took a lot of effort. I don’t think, however, that this will be a story of triumph over communication barriers at my next interview.

Hypolipidaemia

A woman just said to me, “can I please have some Cholesterol & Henna?”

Customer Etiquette Lesson #45

“At the back” is not a place where we keep everything you want and can’t find on the shelves.

An Odd Wednesday

Today was nuts. M dealt with a series of strange customers before I started my shift, one of them was a woman who called the pharmacy to hold us responsible for pricking her finger on the staple of her repeat form. “Do you know how dangerous this could be for a diabetic?” is what she said. I wouldn’t know how to respond to this sort of idiocy. Please comment if you can think of a comeback.

Shortly after I started work a girl approaches the dispensary with a request for the Morning After Pill. Remembering the idiot I dispensed it to on Monday I look up and try to figure out whether she’s also an idiot. She’s around 26, slightly anxious but otherwise friendly-looking. I make up my mind that she’s one of the nicer ones though even if I thought otherwise M would make me counsel her anyway.

I take a box of Levonelle (the generic of Postinor, made by the same company and even looks identical except for the name) and before I have time to do anything else she says “is that the generic?” with the tone more suited for “is that rat poison?”

Me: Yes
Girl: I don’t want it! Don’t give me the generic!
Me: Okay, (and just because she’s so frightened of generic substitution) it’s exactly the same though. Same company makes them, they even look just like Postinor (and when I say this I’m already in the middle of switching Levonelle for Postinor, i.e. I’m not refusing her request)
Girl: No! I don’t want the generic! (She puts her wrist to her forehead like she’s about to faint) I just CAN’T take generic things!
Me: No worries, you can have the original brand.
Girl: Thanks (tries to grab Levonelle from my hand and leave but I hold it out of her reach)
Me: I have to ask you a few questions first.
Girl: I’ve had it before, you don’t need to ask me anything.
Me: Sorry, but we need to ask everyone the same questions every time we give this out.
Girl: Look, I’m in a hurry.
Me: It won’t take long.

I proceed to rush through the questions as quickly as I possibly can because she’s now looking at me like she wishes I was dead. Unfortunately I miss a couple of points because I was trying to speak 300 words a minute and M picks up from where I left off to the girl’s epic frustration. “I KNOW“, she says several times, each louder than the last. She’s now glaring at both of us and storms off with the Levonelle before M finishes her last sentence. I’m willing to bet getting pregnant MYSELF that she didn’t take in a single word we said.

After the girl left M and I stared after her feeling like we’ve picked the wrong profession. I spoke first.

“I hope that bitch gets pregnant.”