Day 2 – Osaka

Good evening boys and girls from J-Hoppers hostel in Osaka.

We checked out of the Capsule Hotel this morning and spent half the day shopping around. Considering buying earmuffs. Me, M, J and J’s sister put them on for a photo and they turned out to be really cute. However I think once we’re back in Sydney it’s going to turn totally fob on us.

We had breakfast at a ramen shop on Dotonbori. It was exactly like ramen at Ryo’s and was delicious. After shopping we ate lunch at Freshness Burger, which J’s friend ML said was the best burger place she had ever been to. B, P and I ordered the teriyaki burger and it was awesome mostly because of the bun, which was soft and fresh and kind of eggy.

In the afternoon we checked out of the Capsule Hotel to make our way to J-Hoppers. Taxis are apparently really expensive here so we caught several trains. Trains in Japan are so efficient, needless to say, but also so confusing because we didn’t understand why there we had to change between different types of trains or what any of the signs said or what tickets to buy. When we asked the guy behind the ticket counter at JR Osaka station the price of train tickets to Fukushima, he quoted AU$200 and we were all WTF and it turned out he looked up Fukushima like on another island.

Eventually we made it to J-Hoppers and I swear I will never bring two separate suitcases ever again. We got a bit lost after leaving Fukushima station and J asked the staff of a random little restaurant for directions. The girl was so nice she actually walked us to the hostel. M said we were going to her restaurant for dinner as thanks and we agreed. It turned out to be the best decision ever. It was a yakitori place where everything was 280 Yen and the food was simple but so so yummy. For dessert we had these giant frozen strawberries stuffed with condensed milk, and warm brownies that were soft on the inside and crispy on the outside. The latter was so good we ordered a total of eight servings no joke. The waiter’s expression when we ordered the second four was of shock. Gaijin fatties.

After dinner it was raining so we walked back to the hostel.

I’m so sleepy. Going to bed. MD is owning ass in thirteen, B is catching up, and T is getting ass-raped.

Good Morning :)

I’m in the Asahiplaza Shinsaibashi hotel in Osaka, we just arrived last night.

By the time we set everything down and went out most places were closed, but there were still a lot of people walking around. We sort of just went walking aimlessly exploring. There was someone standing on the corner of every sidewalk. It would always be a young person, wearing all black and wearing a long skirt. I have no idea what they do but am curious.

We walked around the Dotonburi and it was cold so we went into the first cafe we came across. It was like a tea party place with poofy flowery sofas and tiny tables. After we sat down, the waiter brought us water and menus and we realised there was nothing we wanted to eat. They had things like hot chocolate and latte and waffles and cake with no explanation of what kind. Even back home it would’ve been too rude to walk out, so we were stuck with “one order minimum per person” and high prices. MD suggested we all order toast which was the cheapest thing on the menu, but that would have looked totally dumb and nobody wanted toast anyway. In the end we all ordered cheap drinks but the bill still came to 6,030 yen.

The Capsule hotel felt a little bit claustrophobic and reminded me of a morgue. It was however really clean and toiletries were provided so we didn’t have to shop for them first. The showers were communal. Only J and I were up for it, and that was when the showers were completely empty. I’m so glad we’re only here for one night because it’s just too inconvenient. We had lockers to keep things that we need immediately and luggage was kept downstairs. If we wanted to access them we have to see the front desk first and present our receipt, and when we were done the luggage gets put back into the storage room. Our Capsules and lockers are located downstairs through locked doors so it was a bitch running back and forth especially if we forget something.

Today we’re doing exactly what we did last night except everything would be open and we’ll keep out of Dolores Umbridge cafe.

What Should I Eat?

They should totally make one of these for Australia.

I have to tell you something.

I’m scared that by the time I come back there’ll be too many new Fug entries for me to keep up with :(

Go S!

S had fun last night ;)

Link removed at request by guess who.

<3

When I was in year 7 I changed email because there was so much junk mail about penis enlargements and crazy porn and I don’t think spam filters existed back in the day. My parents came across them and assumed I had subscribed to these products seeking to enlarge somebody’s disco stick and I remember we had this massive argument where I was screaming out the most obvious and stupid things ever like “I DON’T EVEN HAVE A PENIS”.

Anyway, ten years later C tells me that he was the one who looked up all those websites to subscribe to them using my email because he liked me.

Spotty

There’s this really annoying thing my parents do.

A few minutes ago they were warning me against the dangers of overexposing skin to UV light, and my dad launches into his famous testimonials about the husband of some family friend who didn’t believe in sunscreen and ended up with a face full of sun spots and now basks in regret. My parents always have testimonials to back up whatever lecture they’re giving me. They know someone who can’t find a husband because they didn’t wash the dishes. They know someone who broke out in rashes because they ate too much chili. They know someone who dropped out of uni to work at Red Rooster because their parents spoilt them as a child.

Anyway back to the sun spots. After every anecdote he’d suggest I confirm the details with the subject of the story, obviously knowing very well that it would be the last thing I’d do. Today he says, “you can call him and he’ll tell you about what not wearing sunscreen did to his skin”.

So I imagine myself dialling sun spot man’s number, “hi, you don’t know me but my parents are friends with your wife and they were telling me that you’re riddled with moles, so what happened?”.

I was thinking one day I’m going to say “ok, give me the phone number”. But despite the fact that I’m quite sure most of these stories are complete bullshit, if it happens to be a real one I’m scared I’ll have to follow through.

Leighton Meester feat Robin Thicke: Somebody to Love

New MV from Leighton Meester.

My honest opinion is that Leighton should focus on playing Blair Waldorf and quit while she’s ahead after Cobra Starship. If she had crazy enviable vocal chords then it would be different. She’d be like a Gossip Girl Kylie Minogue or something, but the voice in that song could be an electronically enhanced anybody. It could be Serena. It could be Little J. It could be Eric.

She looks like a high class prostitute. I can sort of understand why trashy might be something to aspire to for someone who plays Blair all day but a mediocre song with a hot rebellious Leighton gyrating against random men isn’t as appealing as one would expect.

Besides, heavy make-up hides her eyes, and she has the best eyes ever. I like the red lips though.

Well at least she’s expressing her inner skank through music. Sadly the same can’t be said for Jenny Thigh Highs Humphrey.